61 Hilarious Cat Jokes | Funny Quips About Fluffy Kitties

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Photo by Loan on Unsplash

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Cats can be funny creatures. They might come across as highly independent and sometimes mean. However, once you live with one of these furballs, the goofy parts of their personalities really start to shine.

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It makes sense that there would be so many silly cat jokes for adults and children out there. Whether using a purrfect pun or just telling a funny story about when your kitty fell in the bathtub, cat jokes are plentiful and make for a great time.

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So, let’s dive into some of the funniest cat jokes, puns, and quips to make your day even better (and if it doesn’t, the photos of cute kitties should.)

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61 Funny Cat Jokes You’ll Love

From funny cat stories from the mouths of comedians to ameowsing cat puns, here are 61 funny jokes about cats that you need in your life.

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Kitty Jokes From Comedians

1. "Cats are more like 'Hey, what are you up to? Never mind — I just remembered I don’t care.’” - Zoltan Kaszas.

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2. "I make a lot of jokes about my cat, but I always think wouldn’t it be fun if my cat was making jokes about me to his cat friends? That would be awesome if my cat was at home going 'What’s the deal with all the crying?'" - Debra DiGiovanni.

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3. "Somewhere there is a house cat that did more than I did today." - Kristeen von Hagen.

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4. "I used to be in a band called 'Missing Cat'… You probably saw our posters." - Stewart Francis.

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Cat Puns That Are Ameowsing

5. "Where do cats spend a family day? The mew-seum."

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6. “What do you call a pile of kittens? A meowntain.”

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7. “What is a cat’s favorite movie? The Sound of Mewsic.”

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Side Note: Would you like to name your cat after a character from your favorite movies, but you're finding it hard to choose? Here's a list of some adorable movie character names for kitties.

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8. "What do you call a kitty who lives in an igloo? An eskimew."

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9. “Why was the cat so agitated? Because he was in a bad mewd.”

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10. “What do cats love to do in the morning? Read the mewspaper.”

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Side Fact: Kitties are very vocal creatures. They don’t actually meow in the wild. Meowing and purring are sounds cats developed to communicate with humans. Isn’t that just amazing?

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Read more about why cats meow at you here.

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Photo by Erica Marsland Huynh on Unsplash

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Kitty Jokes From the Internet

11. "How do French cats say 'Thank You'? Meow-ci Beaucoup." - Reader's Digest Canada.

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12. "If lights run on electricity and cars run on gas, what do cats run on? Their paws." - Reddit.com.

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13. "Why are kittens actually excellent bosses? They have great littership." - Parade.com.

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14. "What do you call the cat that was caught by the police? The purr-petrator." - Reddit.com.

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15. "What do you call a feline with a short haircut? A bob cat, of course." - Reader's Digest Canada.

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16. "What do polite cats say when they're in the way? Paw-don me. I'm furry sorry." - Reader's Digest Canada.

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Side Fact: Cats can be very polite in their own ways. They can use a smile to welcome a stranger into their environment. A smile from a kitty is super cute, and you need to always remember to smile back. Read more about if cats can smile here.

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17. “What’s a cat’s favorite TV show? Claw and Order.” - Parade.com

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18. “Why did the cat wear a top hat? Beclaws he was feline sassy.” - Buzzfeed.com

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19. “Why did the cat avoid eating lemons? They made him a sour-puss.” - Parade.com

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20. "What do kitties like to eat for breakfast? Mice Krispies." - Reddit.com

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Cat Dad Jokes

21. “What do you call it when a cat is super-stylish? Haute cat-ture.”

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22. "Where do kitties always fly out of when they travel? Kitty Hawk."

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23. "What state has a lot of dogs and cats? Petsylvania."

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24. "Where does a kitty go when it loses its tail? The re-tail store."

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25. “What's a cat's favorite sport? Hairball.”

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Pawsitively Great Puns

26. "How did the mommy cat know she was pregnant? Her test came back pawsitive."

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27. "What do kitties quote from the movie Bridesmaids? Help me, I'm paw."

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28. “How do cats stop crimes? They call claw enforcement.”

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29. “What did the sick cat say? I feel clawful.”

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Side Fact: It's not always easy to tell whether your fur baby is sick or not. However, their sleeping position can sometimes give clues about their current health.

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Read here to learn more about your cat's sleeping positions while sick.

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30. "What do you call a kitty who lives at the beach? Sandy claws."

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31. "Why did the cat get an "A" on their English assignment? They properly used an independent claws."

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Read Next: These funny cat quotes are ameowzing.

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Photo by Jari Hytönen on Unsplash

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Cat Jokes That Are Mice

32. "Before catching a mouse, what did the dad cat say to his family? Let us prey."

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33. "What song do cats always request at dances? Mice Mice Baby."

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34. "What's a kitty's favorite game to play with a mouse? Catch."

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35. “What is a cat’s favorite song? Three blind mice.”

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36. "What do kitties like to eat on a hot day? A mice-cream cone."

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37. “What should you say to your cat when you leave the house? Have a mice day.”

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Side Fact: Not all cats are good at catching mice; that’s just a stereotype. However, Siamese cats are amazing mousers due to their hunting instinct. They don’t even need to be trained to catch mice.

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Read more about Siamese cats as mousers here.

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And you might enjoy reading my article on silly cat puns.

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These Puns Are Purrfect

38. "Why did the kitty have to go to an accountant? They lost money in a purramid scheme."

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39. “Before a cat fight, what is usually said? Hold my purrse."

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40. “What do cats look for in a significant other? A great purrsonality.”

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41. “Why are cats bad at making decisions? They become so purrplexed.”

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42. “Why do cats always get their way? They are very purr-suasive.”

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Side Fact: Why do cats purr when you stroke them? Usually, it’s because they’re happy and they want to show you that. It’s also been theorized that a cat’s purr has healing powers.

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Whatever the case, we can all agree that purring sound is one of the cutest things on the planet. Read more on why cats purr when you stroke them here.

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More Ameowzing Kitten Jokes

43. “What did the kitten have at their birthday party? A pounce house.”

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44. "What does a cat say after making a joke? Just kitten."

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45. "When a cat says goodbye, what do they say? See ya litter."

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46. "How does a kitty decide what it wants from the store? It flips through the cat-alog."

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47. "What did the kitties do when they realized they had a bad plan? They decided to (cat)nip it in the bud."

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Side Fact: Cats can sometimes do dumb things, like creating a bad plan to climb onto a shelf with three plants and a vase. Sometimes they also get stuck in blinds. We can all agree that kitties have some terrible ideas.

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However, are they actually dumb? Here is a list of the dumbest cat breeds (that might not be dumb after all).

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And you might enjoy reading about black cat jokes and dog and cat jokes.

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Photo by Tengyart on Unsplash

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48. “What do you call a cat who became a doctor? A first-aid kitten.”

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49. “What did one cat say while her friend was complaining? Tail me about it."

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50. "What do kitties call a big pile of laundry? A meowtain to climb."

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51. “Why was the animal lover so untrustworthy? She kept letting the cat out of the bag.”

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52. “What do cats call a nice dinner? A fancy feast.”

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Side Note: Fancy Feast is just one of the many fantastic wet cat food options out there. If you want to be sure you're feeding your fur baby the best dishes, read about the best kitten wet food options.

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53. “Why did some cat friends go to the mall? There was a buy-one-get-one-furry deal.”

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54. “What's a kitten's favorite kind of sticker? Scratch and sniff.”

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55. “What’s another name for a cat’s house? A scratch pad.”

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56. “What was that cat’s favorite book? The Great Catsby.”

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57. "When is a vet the busiest? When it's raining cats and dogs."

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58. "Did you hear about that kitty who swallowed a ball of yarn? She had mittens."

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Side Fact: Even though a cat swallowing a ball of yarn is a joke, kitties really do love playing with string. They’ll play with strings on blinds, curtains, blankets, etc. Anything that hangs, they will grab.

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Read more about why cats love string here. Make sure to get your fur baby a lot of cat toys so they stop interfering with your love of knitting.

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59. "What do you call a kitty who loves to bowl? An alley cat."

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60. “How do two cats end a fight? They hiss and make up.”

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61. "What should you use to brush a cat? A catacomb."

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Side Fact: Have you ever wondered why your cat gags when you run your nails across a comb? Perhaps you’ve seen videos of people doing this to get their kitties’ reactions on camera. Cats are very sensitive to sounds and can develop a dislike for certain noises.

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Read more about why cats gag at combs here.

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Photo by Jae Park on Unsplash

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Which Jokes About Cats Did You Love?

Hopefully, this silly post about the best cat jokes will have made your day. Perhaps you've learned some new material to make your friends laugh (or groan).If you would like to learn more about cats, why don't you explore this section on cat behaviors?

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Maybe you might learn something new about your fluffy baby. And for all the cat lovers out there, here are some of the best quotes about cat lovers to make you feel part of the community. And you might enjoy my post on funny cat memes and black cat memes.

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The Discerning Cat