Are you ready to unleash your laughter with a collection of hilarious dog and cat jokes? If you’re a lover of our furry friends and enjoy a good chuckle, these jokes will have you grinning from ear to ear. With 55 top-notch jokes curated for your amusement, we’ve got something for everyone in this pawesome repertoire.
55 Dog and Cat Jokes
Cats Vs. Dogs Showdown
- What’s a dog’s favorite type of pizza?
2. What do you call a cat that can play the guitar?
- A mew-sician!
3. Why do cats always get their way?
- They are purr-suasive!
4. How do dogs greet each other?
- “Pleased to sniff you!”
5. How do cats greet their friends?
- “How’ve you been feline lately?”
6. What do you get if you cross a dog with a computer?
- A lot of bytes!
7. What do cats eat for breakfast?
- Mice Krispies!
8. Why did the dog chase his tail?
- He was trying to make ends meet!
9. What do you call a cat who loves to bowl?
- An alley cat!
10. Why do dogs run in circles before lying down?
- They’re winding down for the night!
Cats on the Prowl
11. Why did the cat sit on the computer?
- To keep an eye on the mouse!
12. What do you call a pile of kittens?
- A meow-tain!
13. What is a cat’s favorite color?
14. Why was the cat sitting on the calendar?
- It was up for a date!
15. How do cats end a fight?
- They hiss and make up!
16. What’s a cat’s favorite game?
17. What do cats wear to sleep?
18. What’s a cat’s favorite movie?
- The Sound of Mew-sic!
19. Why did the cat join the Red Cross?
- She wanted to be a first-aid kit!
20. What do you get when you cross a cat with a parrot?
- A carrot!
Dog Days of Laughter
21. Why did the dog sit in the shade?
- He didn’t want to be a hot dog!
22. What do you call a dog magician?
- A labracadabrador!
23. Why did the Dachshund sit in the shade?
- It was a hot dog!
24. What do you call a dog that can dance?
- A cha-cha-cha-huahua!
25. Why did the dog wear a watch?
- He wanted to be a watch dog!
26. Why did the dog go to school?
- To improve his bark-ground!
27. What’s a dog’s favorite musical instrument?
- The trom-bone!
28. What do dogs do after they finish obedience school?
- They get their masters!
29. Why did the dog bring a towel to the party?
- He wanted to have a blast and shake it off!
30. What do you get when you cross a dog with a calculator?
- A friend you can count on!
Mixed Bag of Whiskers & Waggers
31. What do you call a large group of cats?
- A purr-ade!
32. What kind of dog likes taking baths?
- A shampoo-dle!
33. Why did the cat wear a fancy dress?
- She was feline fine!
34. What did the dog say to the tree?
35. How is a cat like a comma?
- They both have claws at the end of their paws/es!
36. Why do dogs love computers?
- They get to have a byte!
37. What do cats read in the morning?
- The mewspaper!
38. How do you know if a dog is a geek?
- He has “bites” and “bytes”!
39. Why did the cat run away from the tree?
- It was scared of the bark!
40. What’s a dog’s favorite dessert?
41. How does a cat flirt?
- It winks and purrs!
42. Why did the dog cross the road?
- To chase the postman on the other side!
43. Why did the cat go to school?
- To become litter-ate!
44. What do you call a dog in winter?
- A chili dog!
45. Why was the cat bad at chess?
- She was always in a check-meow-t situation!
46. Why do dogs make good employees?
- They have a great work ethic – always chasing their goals!
47. What did the cat say to the dog?
- “Check meow-t!”
48. What do you call a cat that can put together furniture?
- An assembly kit-ten!
49. How does a dog stop a video?
- By hitting the paws button!
50. What kind of cat likes water?
- A mer-cat!
51. Why did the dog join the band?
- He played the drum-bone!
52. What do you get when you cross a cat with a lemon?
- A sourpuss!
53. Why was the dog a great musician?
- He had the drum and the bass down pat!
54. How do you know a cat is agitated?
- It’s having a hissy fit!
55. Why do cats always get their way at the computer?
- They have the mouse under control!
In the great debate of cats versus dogs, one thing’s for sure: both are a source of endless amusement! So whether you’re team whiskers or team waggers, we hope these jokes brought a smile to your face.